Even with a titled track list smothered in festive promise, Sia fails to capture the overly cliché spirit of Christmas. Instead, she storms in with every cynic’s reality of the festive period.
Santa’s Coming For Us is the big one – it’s the real sparkly, tinsel-covered track. It has the heavy ringing of bells, and almost everything you could wish for in a Christmas song… Only for it to be served with a side of sunny vibes – something Sia clearly couldn’t leave behind in her homeland of Australia. Annoyingly so, it’s super catchy.
Another of Sia’s promising festive-filled tracks is Candy Cane Lane. Expect all things that should complete a successful Christmas track – from Santa to the mention of Rudolph – except without the real love of the festive period. It suddenly becomes disappointing.
It’s all downhill from there. Snowman and Snowflake pair together as the perfect tracks that will leave you depressingly emotional after a few festive drinks. The sombre duo take things down a notch, and put a dampener on all things Christmas.
Ho Ho Ho sounds like The Grinch being forced to take an interest in Christmas. Filled with references of alcohol, it seems Sia’s experience of the festive period is nothing more than a time for forgetting, and delving into a bottle of bubbly.
Despite of the refreshing take on Christmas, albeit a gloomy one, Sia sets her priorities straight with Puppies Are Forever. Seemingly based off the Dogs Trust campaign ‘A Dog Is For Life, Not Just For Christmas’, she sings “they’re so cute and fluffy with shiny coats”. That’s enough to take on a dog, right?
If you can get to the end of the album without falling asleep, you’ll reach Underneath The Christmas Lights. There’s a reason why it’s the final track on Everyday Is Christmas: it’s the one that makes you question exactly why you just listened to the others. Much like the rest of the album, it is drenched in desperation and cynicism.
We’ll be sticking to Bublé this Christmas!