So it’s no secret that city-in-bloom Southampton has been working hard to better its centre and modernise its services, with such improvements as £70 million structural developments offering 1,200 new jobs, as well as new restaurants, flats, offices, and much more. It’s no wonder then that redditor Adnotamentum is livid – because despite the wide array of new developments, the multi-million pound investments and billion pound profits – our city DOESN’T. HAVE. A FLAG. The audacity, right?
“As if it weren’t bad enough living in this shit country, today I discovered our a fucking mazing city doesn’t have a flag. This is a fucking problem right because the bastards at Portsmouth have a flag AND ITS A FUCKING AMAZING FLAG.”
I can see what he’s saying – I mean, communism has a flag, ISIS have one, even Portsmouth have one. Yet despite all the investments and improvements our sunshine (ahem) city has undergone, we still can’t afford to sew a fancy pattern into a strip of fabric? Real modern, Southampton. Real state-of-the-art. *eyeroll*
The good news is that we don’t need to design a new flag, that’s already been done for us (aay, take a look). We just have to take the non shitty parts of our herald (yes, we have a herald, which for some fucking reason the city council doesn’t use and instead opts for some “ooo, its sooo modern, it must be goood, we’re so down with the kids (despite being like 75 years old and having nothing better to do than be on a city council)” bullshit (take a look)) and then we stitch those good heraldry parts onto a flag.
Heres what it will look like:
Personally, I think it’s a great idea. It’s just what the city needs to boost moral in times where scaffolding is more prevalent than sunshine. We should have it flying high from the clock tower so that it provides a safety beacon for those unwitting commuters that find themselves lost in a sea of lobotomised Pokemon hunters searching for their next Geodude-can-you-get-out-of-my-way?! I’m gonna be late for work again.’
“I dream of a day where my children will look out across the city and they will see the flag of Hampshire, England, the UK, and Europe, all flying side by side. But when they look up at me and ask, “Daddy, what is that utterly majestic and magnificent jack flying high yonder there?” I’ll say, with a tear in my eye, “thats the flag of Southampton ole’ boy.”