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Football Manager. Just a game, right? Wrong. It should come with a public health warning as this shiny disc is more addictive than crack. It’s the source of constant procrastination and can be the sole reason a 1st slips to a 2:1, then to a 2:2, then a third…but who cares? You just took Accrington Stanley to the Champions League Final! What stage of addiction are you at?

  1. It’s just a bit of fun at the moment. You manage to find a little time to play it in between your busy social life and essay deadlines. A couple of hours playing a week maybe? Casual.
  2. The game starts sneaking into your life. Instead of counting sheep at night you run through your preferred first and second elevens (not out loud of course, that’d be weird…). You begin noting down tactics during lectures, becoming less interested in the economic reforms of Stalin and more interested in perfecting the 3-4-3 formation.2Transfer targets start creeping into your shopping list
  3. Transfer targets start creeping into your shopping list
  4. The terminology of the game has entered your vocabulary. Instead of asking for a girls number on a night out you try to click ‘declare interest’. You find yourself shouting “Where’s the passion, lads?” at the telly when your real life team are losing.4
  5. You’re playing the game during lectures5
  6. You join the University Football Manager Society (if one doesn’t exist you start one!)6
  7. Those late nights staying up and telling yourself ‘just one more game’ at 4:27 AM are catching up with you and you start skipping lectures. ‘Ahh it wasn’t that important anyway’ you tell yourself as you stay in bed and embark on your 12th season with Premier League Port Vale.
  8. You consider this appropriate attire for a night out7
  9. You think it’s acceptable to wear a suit when your team reaches a cup final9
  10. You start applying for real life Managers jobs. Hurry, the Cheltenham Town job has just become available! Better get that CV in.10

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